One thing that might help is a trade to the Pirates. He'd fit in better there, what with all the Rs.

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Every proper yacht has a ball buoy.

True. I was just messing with you.

This puts a lot of pressure on the other twin.

Even Kitty Genovese is like, "Maybe you guys should take a walk."

Hi I'm Reader Dave

Relevant

The problem with the people that keep pointing out Lueke's history is that it ignores the possibility for redemption despite a checkered past. People make mistakes and they grow as a result of it. Yes, it's an ugly truth. Nobody is going to deny it. But the fact remains: many people have gone on from being members of…

LOL on both, you're a natural at this.

Congratulations! With this comment, you have officially claimed the title of "Lamest Motherfucker on the Internet." Please send your address to tips@deadspin.com, so that we may send you your prize: a JanSport backpack full of dicks.

Worst comments on the best dunks of the year, ranked:

It's tough. When there are actual facts, such as the charges against him, you can't not report those. The only answer I can think of is to be objective, and to not brush it under the rug when he's cleared. We've written as much post-charges-being-dropped on Hoffner as we did about the charges themselves.

You'd think a university housed in Lincoln would be decidedly pro-Union.

Listen. I'm not writing these to prove that I can cook. I don't care a whit whether anyone who reads these thinks that I can cook. I care whether people enjoy reading them, and I care whether the readers who follow the instructions in their own kitchens enjoy the food they produce. Those are my concerns, and photos do…

Pot Roast & Gravy

Israel has always been a bit strange with regards to basketball. Why, back in the 80s, they didn't even like Jordan.