“I’ll be back. Prob-probably.”

“Do us a favor! Restore the top button to all your shirts!”

13 years is nothing. I waited 22 years for My Bloody Valentine to follow up “Loveless.”

Prose before hoes.

Just last week he made sloppy joes!

Dear Salty,

Both my wife and I work very hard and we think we deserve, nay, are entitled to blow off a lot of steam with a nice dinner out with our 14 month-old Instabook tenant.

Yet we get dirty looks (of jealousy?) wherever we go because we find it convenient to change our kid’s nappy at our table. (It’s the good…

Your ideas intrigue me, and I would like to subscribe to your newsletter

You merely adopted the Party City. I was born into it.

How could this happen? They started like Romeo and Juliet but it ended in tragedy.

“So, you Academy voters like Moonlight, huh? Well, I’ll give ya the whole damn moon! See how you like me then!”

“Why!? Why was I programmed to feel pain!?!”

R. Kelly is PAOK's biggest supporter.

This can only end in one possible way: Mama John has to start dating again, and they rebrand the comany as “Uncle Roger’s” pizza, the pizza that wants to cop a feel as it sloppily tucks you into bed at night.  Papa John can deliver pizza to you on alternate weekends and for three weeks in the summer.

I’ve known there was something off about this guy ever since he tried to get me to give him my fingernails.

Pretty sure you mean Breen/Ca~aaaage 

I kindof hate when studios make a big deal of stuff like this ahead of time instead of just letting it happen. B99 doesn’t make a big fanfare whenever it does something woke. It just does it.

I know that CW didn’t make a huge deal about Sarah lance being bi before it was revealed.

a sausage egg cheese mcguffin

Solo: A Star Wars Story finally revealed the origin of Han Solo’s iconic DL-44 blaster pistol (He got it from Woody Harrelson! Wow!)