I don’t think the divining rod gets used enough in video games.

I want that face thing to happen as a live wallpaper on my phone.

Where will it stop? Will it stop at Thomas Jefferson and George Washington cosplayers? I don’t know!

My first reaction: this comment is bullshit.

Not content enough to try and “win” at Christmas, he goes and shits all over Halloween too. I want to see what he has up his sleeve for Martin Luther King, Jr. Day.

“Hey, how about them homeless people? Amirite? Hhahahahah!”

Fuck AT&T

I think the plan to make Puerto Rico feel so miserable and unwelcome that the island will finally opt for independence and deprive Democrats of potential latin voters might backfire on Trump and the GOP.

Regarding putting a chain on your keys: Make sure your keyring and the chain are both hefty. All the links in the chain also need to be welded closed. All this means that the chain is going to likely be big and heavy and not only impractical for day-to-day use but also unsightly. Still, if you think it is something…

A billion dollar graffiti tagger’s paradise.

I’m an unathletic weakling and I’m pretty sure that even I could lob a brick of weed (or meth, or heroine, or whatever) over that wall. I also have poor hand-eye coordination and I’m pretty sure that even I could catch a brick of drugs that was tossed from the other side.

Well played.

It’s a trap! Abort! Abort!

Observatories Across the World Announce Groundbreaking New Discovery in Heaven of Angels Bumping Into Each Other!

Now all I need is a piano.

I cured my syphilis with kale and carrot juice smoothies. Wanna fuck?

Melania, the real one at least, has evil lady anime eyes.

Good news! You’ve cured your HIV infection!

I dunno.... looks dreary. How are the schools in the neighborhood?

I’m moving to Connecticut.