Ditto! Eye makeup makes me feel Dressed Up, whereas I will happily go about my day with red/orange/neon coral lipstick + mascara. Granted, I work in a lab, so 1. The bar is low 2. No one gives a shit what I wear as long as it’s up to safety protocols.

Hahahahaha! My female dog does crow pose every time she pees. She has never managed to do extended crow pose.

He’s got a pretty bad walking-around face, so yeah...

Agree, full eye makeup seems way more iffy during the daytime. I wear NARS Schiap or Red Square almost every day! I definitely don’t feel “evening.”

He is so disgusting. Nice kiss and tell there, asshole.

“First you’d have to drug me.”

HARD PASS and this is from someone who gave 2 thumbs up to a rat-tailed Shia.

Does that mean he managed to give her an orgasm more than nine times over the course of their ten-year marriage, or that he hooked her up with a teenager who could actually get the job done?

My collective dating history says I would but I like to think people change?

Robin Thicke, singing: “What rhymes with ‘hug me’?”

I’m sorry, where is the “FUCK NO” option?

How much am I drinking? That he’s paying for? How long have I been without the touch of man? How desperate am I for a story to sell for minor ducats to the Press?

NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO.

Hard pass!

Of course I would. Isn’t he rumored to have a big one?

Yes, they do stop growing when you get older. They just kinda fall out and don’t come back. I’m not even that old but my eyebrows, even where I’ve never plucked, are thinning out. Good thing I started out with thick ones, I guess.

Red is always a safe bet when ordering sight unseen (for me). However if I bought one of these it wouldn’t matter the color because I would never use it, just look at ittttt.

It is, truly, my dream to be able to go everywhere in my pajamas, so I wish this had been me.

I love these write-ups, but is there anyone on staff there over 40? It would be great to see what’s in the arsenal of someone with aging skin. I’m currently trying to find a foundation that offers a good balance of coverage with just enough moisture that it won’t settle in my laugh lines and the “11” between my eyes.…