This is gold:

It’s the sad ball pit of overpriced music festivals for douchebag trustfundarian glampers. They should have realized something was wrong when Blink 182 was the headliner.

It’s like Dashcon for social media influencers

You had me until Nickelback.

How - exactly - was it hackneyed?

Yeah but... the pun is brilliant. The hero gets the girl in the end.

‘I don’t want to come off as some douche who is just flaunting around their straight white male privilege. I know my wealth could potentially make me attractive enough for someone to finally take a chance on me, but it’s a pretty giant can of worms that I really don’t want to open unless absolutely I have to. When do…

2003 Call of Duty

“Pfft. Amateur.”

I only ever played the first DKC and wasn’t a big fan...

Announces engagement in Jan. 20 weeks pregnant 18 weeks later. Math checks out.

This proves that he finishes 4th of his Dad’s favorite kids

Wow, this guy just can’t stop killing people. 

You’re wrong, the answer is actually yes to both.

XXX - Lando’s last film.

this is gizmodo, where everyone lives in the city and is a freelancer