He’s also probably pretty traumatized and needs some time to decompress before showing up at work again. In his shoes, I would too.

I’ve noticed that people like being attached to tragedies, especially when they weren’t actually harmed by them. And I’ve seen people goofy enough to lie about being attached to said tragedy. People are weird.

There are so many PT Cruisers around here that I’ve concluded the state must have bought a bunch and they’re driven by employees. There’s no other good explanation.

When I first heard of this one, I couldn’t decide who was worse: the people who do this for money or me and my dick friends who did this as teenagers just to fuck with people. We’d call a random number and cry and tell them “Mom, I’m in jail!”

In my house, it’s the younger cat bullying the older cat. I’d feel worse about it except my now older cat was previously the younger cat bullying the (now deceased) older cat. So she kind of deserves it.

I hope that’s true even though my two current cats seem to hate each other.

I once tried to get a copy of complaint filed against me in small claims court and not provided by the plaintiff (I called them and asked for it and they basically said “haha fuck you.”)* The line just to get into the courthouse wrapped around the block. I said “fuck this,” went home and found another way to deal with…

I got two brother kittens in 1998. One died of a brain tumor in 2011 and I would pet and snuggle the other and be so thankful he was there or I would have been even more bereft than I already was. I realized then I would have to get another cat so I would have one to snuggle on when the remaining cat passed. He did…

I just wish Spotify’s app were more reliable. It has improved, but that just means it insists I’m offline when I’m not about 2/10 times I open it instead of 7/10.

It’s always struck me as hugely ironic that “you are wonderful and special/don’t dwell on your mistakes/etc.” is widely embraced by people who think their shit doesn’t stink and should reflect on their actions more but widely rejected by people who actually have poor self esteem and would benefit from less navel…

I would enjoy some good relationships in my life, friend and romantic. But that’s not in the cards for me and solitude is way more pleasant than being around people you don’t really want to be with.

Alone in a crowd is the worst kind of alone. When you’re ALONE alone, you can at least get some peace and quiet.

I always have two so there’s a bit of a grief buffer when one dies.

I don’t think my mostly solitary lifestyle would even be possible without pets. And I also think having them in my life helps protect me from bad people. They provide companionship that I might otherwise seek out from anyone willing to provide it and bad people smell that desperation. My pets absorb the reek of social…

People who think social media is the devil aren’t using it right. Yeah, there’s a lot of cesspool out there but that’s because people are garbage, not social media. When I stop swapping recipes with my mom, chatting baseball with my cousin, and catching up with school friends (who all live at least 300 miles away) and…

I spent years trying to cure my social isolation and spent years failing miserably. I finally just gave up because my constant failure at making friends/finding a mate made me feel far worse than being alone does. Being alone and mostly content > going out multiple times a week with people who don’t really like me…

You dudes own those tiny feet! I saw a man with tiny feet wearing purple shoes once and stopped to admire him; that was a confident fellow.

I’ll never forget the lyric “she’s got a body for business and a head for sin, she knock me over like a bowling pin.”

I’m looking at a serious pulmonary diagnosis that would put a transplant on the table. My pulmonologist likened it to trading one serious illness for another. My best to you and your family.

When I asked the nurses at my last PAP test about lighter periods they looked at me like I was from Mars.