MR. MET IS COMING FOR YOU, CARDS FANS

We better get one more, I don't want to have to deal with Blues ball.

when Jeremy Hazelbaker hit a solo four-bagger.

So close to reaching the climax! I'm going to explode with excitement.

One more of these and it’s a winning streak for Deadspin readers.

To be fair, the Cubs are still playing for something. They need to tune up for the playoffs. The Cards are more or less finishing up the string this season.

so close!

There’s always the next game!

Look at that home record. They hate St Louis as much as the rest of us do.

And whatever that shit on a cracker they call “pizza” is. Fuck St. Louis.

Two away

I intentionally don't look at the Cards score anymore, so that these posts can be a pleasant work day surprise.

And your “barbecue” sucks too!

Cubs magic number stands at 5...doubled up with the Cards loss, woot!

Just outside of the Wild Card and looking in. Let’s keep it that way, NL teams!

Thank you for your continued support of people who can’t stand Cardinals fans.

WotcherHarry

Yeah, it's called being Bengalized, and there doesn't seem to be a cure...