I hooked last night with a guy with a smaller than average package. I could tell that he's really self-conscious about it. This is...new territory for me. Any trail blazers have any good advice? For what it's worth, he knows what he's doing with his fingers and mouth, and gave me an amazing orgasm, so I'm not worried…

Godspeed You, Black Emperor is my go to "I'm so cool, I'm obscure" band reference. I fear it's too effective. My other one was Neutral Milk Hotel until April ruined it for me.

Can we talk about the fact that they turned The Giver into a movie? Is this a good thing or a bad thing? I loved that book.

Ooooh, I was hoping someone would post this. I <3 Wallace and Grommit (and you).

Why dafuq are its eyes all wide set like that?

Have you said this on another post before? If not, you have a doppelgänger. But mostly I know this has been said before by SOMEONE on Jezebel, because I decided that day to steal it and never look back.

A wild 20-year-old memory appears!

Better than the Braden/Jayden/Caden nonsense. And better than weirdo hybrid names like Jaron. Fuck that shit.

No Mr. Big to make Carrie act like a driveling idiot. I like this Carrie a lot more than SATC Carrie, too.

I'm sending this article to my dad.

Especially when it's the weekend and there's track work!

I actually counted 45. Anyone else?

I feel like they're splicing some Tyler Durden-esque frames in there.

I came here to hate on this.

I did too. I read the whole thing like doop da doop.

You guys, I'm laughing at this, I'm laughing at your gifs, I'm laughing at wet fart black bean or split pea soup. It was all served to me on a poo poo platter. LAUGHS FOR ALL!!!

Ahhh, so his resume's a bit more extensive if you're...well...not American. :)

It's really effective. It's hard not to like the guy (though I'm not yet sold on his utter hunk status - he's a bit bony for my personal tastes). I just assumed I'd missed several blockbusters that would explain that tremendous crowd. The man can dress though, oof.

I'm not even trying to be one of those people but, besides being Loki, what has he done? Is he, like, a superstar now? Can someone please summarize this up for me?

I've found that if a thing is super awesome, it NEVER goes into production. I still want my pear tree lamp.