so, just like most celebrities then

Most fitting, actually. Owner aspires to own a real car.

Obvious answer is obvious. The Aspire

I used to work in a flooring store. Carpet styles are like the latest fashion fads, going in and out like crazy. Often old stuff would even get reintroduced under a different name as a totally new style.

Looks like they couldn't handle the D.

I’m so glad I’m not the only person who routinely got brutalized by guys like Detlef Schrempf and Rony Seikaly hitting full-court, underhand buzzer threes

Psh, please, TRUE enthusiasts of Porsche are still holding a grudge that the 356 wasn’t available with a PTO hookup. Not even a vestigial nod to the tractor enthusiasts? WTF!!!

I saw Clay Aiken perform a christmas music set at an Indian casino here in Phoenix a couple years ago. I was pretty drunk.

I would have taken a picture of my penis in front of his face and posted it everywhere.

Kanye west was getting some Kanye rest so that he can go on tour at his Kanye best. Not in his Kanye nest, but still flying Kanye West. Torchinsky was next to him and that’s not a Kanye jest. Now normally Kanye’s in his Kanye Vest. Embroidered impeccably with his Kanye Crest. But this is something he keeps close to…

“TEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEETOS!”

“Actually, sir, that’s a Bud Light.”

1. No.

Appeared to be coated in a tacky substance and seemed spongy or soft when squeezed.

Such attention to detail from a guy who traded a first round pick for Trent Richardson.

Only fucking cowards and communists make place or show bets. This is America, pick the goddamn winner!

IBM’s computer thinks in chocolate and vanilla. Sometimes what it knows is chocolate, sometimes it’s vanilla, sometimes it’s a swirl. Sometimes, though, the swirl melts; then you have to decide if there was more chocolate or more vanilla in that puddle. IBM just hired a fat kid that can tell the difference.

“You’re not that fucking good, Alex.”

Jason Whitlock once stole a rib right off my plate at a BBQ restaurant.

0 career TD’s. Stats don’t lie.