i'd bang him like a screen door till next monday

I know I'm old because I don't even care that I don't know what it means.

My favorite part might be the very vocal peanut gallery

Either her contract is up soon or her contract is bulletproof.

I dunno. If this lady saved herself the grief of having to hear why she didn't deserve to reject him, I'd say she did the right thing.

Turning down guys who can't take no for an answer on online dating is seriously the hardest thing (and usually ends with them getting reported and blocked). You don't even have to be subtle—- you can say, "Sorry, I'm just not interested in you" or "NO" and still get bombarded with messages for months and months. Then…

Those guys also shouldn't have worn pants with zippers, they were just asking for it.

If the company can't afford a $10 tip on pizza, they aren't giving out raises or bonuses.

On the several occasions that I've paid with the company card, I always make a point to tip more than usual. It's not my money, so I don't lose much sleep.

I am really, really sorry about this... but I am pretty sure this is the exact dress she is wearing:

I personally like this one better.

I guess 'thirsty' is a thing now?

They left out the "gross and disgusting" body type. I feel marginalized and oppressed.

What does it sound like on the PT Cruiser sound system?

SO BORING. BUT SO PRETTY!

guys i really like taylor swift

#9 is "Do you take your shirt off to poop?" AND 9% OF PEOPLE SAID YES WHO ARE THESE CRAZIES

We need the likes of Garfield, TMNT, Sonic, all that late 80's to early 90's magic.

He shouldnt be allowed to play or even back in that school! WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!