A guy held the door open for me the other day and I immediately invited him over so that he could fuck my wife and make me a cuckold.

Looking for a way to weed out the shitty men in the world? Open a door for all of them and write off the weirdos who are freaked out by that.

New York's hottest club is...

Every time I'm reminded that the book Eat, Pray, Love exists, I die a little.

Interesting because for me, when he started mocking them, I started liking him...

Great. So not only will I die by coughing up a lung, but I will have to die knowing that it's because some Portland hipster yuppie douchebag couldn't be arsed to take his daughter Cucumber to get a fucking pertussis shot between her unicycle and harpsichord lessons.

It sounds TERRIBLE! I am so excited!

Dude... you ever smell banana oil... on weeeed?

Would this be to offset the shame of having a rapist for a quarterback?

Born and raised and still live in Pittsburgh here...I have to respectfully say you're way off. Maybe there is a small group of Yinzers who would behave this way but for the most part, what you're describing seems a little unfair in a city where the culture has transformed so dramatically in the past 30-40 years. You…

Have you ever mentioned your significant other to anyone at work? Mentioned going on a date? Told a story about an old ex?

Straight people come out all the time, but no one realizes that's what they're doing.

SEC defensive player of the year and an All-American in college. If he doesn't get drafted we'll all know why. Good lord, I hope the NFL GMs and scouts aren't completely brain dead.

WHO THE FUCK IS GOOGLE THOUGH.

Surely you should only be selling people on Etsy?? I, at least, consider myself home-made and unique (and maybe a little vintage).

This is why I rob banks.

No, not "problem over." The police aren't as friendly and helpful as you think. Plus, even if you do call the police, we still live in a rape culture, so we're still vulnerable to being preyed upon by men. Glad you've had such an amazing experience with being helped by the police, though! Please, do share!

This seems like a great alternative to the sliding closet doors that are on tracks. Those are always getting messed up by running over clothes or shoelaces and going off track.