This is what I was screaming the whole time. He has no idea what he's talking about.

Well, they're already calling each other liars and I haven't changed the channel. Yet. And Ms. Candy Crowley is controlling things. It's already looking better than the last debate.

Somebody else mentioned restaurant workers. I'm not a CPA, but I am a bookkeeper for a restaurant, which means I occasionally have to be a front of the house restaurant worker. I'm having a Bloody Mary right now and I have a script for Valium. I can validate the crazy.

My lady parts cost me over $100 today. Why? BECAUSE NO ONE LISTENS TO ME, that's why. Most of the time I'm in a bad mood is not because of PMS, it's because the menz around me refuse to listen to talking boobs/vagina. In this case, I had to get new rotors along with new brake pads because NO ONE LISTENED TO ME LAST…

I thought they got better with age. I never smelled pee in the bathroom growing up with my older brother and dad and my husband never gets it anywhere outside the bowl. They all put the seat back down, too. My 11-year-old, on the other hand, apparently sprays half the bathroom every time he pees. He's gotten better…

Yeah, I don't get it either. In the "before" photo she was heavier (because she had just had SIX babies!) and looked tired, but she also looked younger. Now she's thinner, tanned, and better rested. She looks better, but she also looks older.

"She told them that he pinned her to the floor and that the sex hurt." Sex? They are calling rape sex.

I love how Leslie Mann is always given so much space in these pieces. She is fabulous and so is her family.

That sounds exactly like something I would say, Stevie Nicks. To my friends. NOT THE WHOLE WORLD. Now you sound like a psychopath.

I feel like this survey is poking at the assumption that pretty women are dumb and not-pretty women have to compensate by being smart or funny. In this case smart.

I see everyone has already said it, but I love the ATL airport. I've flown into/out of there a bunch of times and the only time I had a problem was when a connecting flight left 10 minutes early (when does that EVER happen?) and left me and about other 30 people behind. It was partly my fault because I was waiting…

Dirt Bag is usually one of my favorite things to read, but leading with that story ruined it for me. It was upsetting enough yesterday when I read that he beat his landlady to death, but adding that last sentence about the cat reopened that hurt and gouged out my insides. And I was going to try to skip the Valium…

YES. I'm about to be 30 and I've alternated between letting my hair grow long and cutting it off my entire life. Whenever I cut it off, it's in an effort to be more grown up. Right now, it's just below the middle of my back and I'm determined to never let it get shorter than this ever again. Old ladies with braids…

I'm a redditor, too, and I've come to accept that Jezebel is basically the opposite of Reddit. Sometimes Jez can be overly zealous and a little ridiculous, just like Reddit, but in completely opposite ways.

I'm pro choice and I've never had an abortion and I don't plan on having one in the future. If I get pregnant now, I know I will love that child and be able to care for him or her. So many women get pregnant and are not able or don't want to care for their child. Why should everyone else force these women to have a…