This CotD was served with an extra dollop of truthiness. It missed the likely observation that the fire fighters called to the scene would accidentally douse the cabin before the engine, since the vapist driver would be emitting more steam than the engine bay.

<i>Who</i> is a spark plug?

You might be interested in watching The Fast Lane Truck’s episodes on the Outback and using X-Mode (and not) on Gold Mine Hill in CO.

This isn’t the Bronco.

The Escape is Focus-based, and it does OK with light off-roading. However a regular Focus, C-Max, or Transit Connect (also Focus-based) would not do well off-road, especially since they’re FWD-only.

Most people don’t know what an FJ is, and didn’t know it existed in the first place. They DO know what a Bronco is (not that this will be called that, since the actual Bronco is yet to be publicly shown, but indications are that it will be body and very direct competition to the Wrangler), though.

I’ll grant you that it’s slow, but your other concerns are easily addressed.

Volvo Volvo Volvo.

I have an ‘06 XC90 T5 AWD, and - knock on wood - it’s been great. Just avoid the 2.9L I6 (due to the transmission, not engine) and you’ll be fine. Try to find one with just 2 rows, since the 2nd row is mounted further aft so more room for 2nd row passengers. Unless you might need the 3rd row.

From the Imaginarium of Dr. Zoidberg...

At least it comes with the funnel.

I’ll take mine as a Speedtail. A little controversial, but it lets me slip through the air much more effectively and less disturbingly.

That is... Something. It’s like a mid-’90s JDM decided to make a Saturn, but were inspired by a recent trip to the UK where they saw a shooting brake.

...just how often are you getting brakes?!

So a non-US Ford EcoSport? Gotcha.

And Nautica-edition Mercury Villagers.

Well, it’s a Chevy, so maybe/probably it got towed a lot? Infinite MPGs on the flatbed of a tow truck!

I was with you until that hateful bravada. Ick.

The problem with the Typhoon and Syclone (ugh, why they had to mispell that...)is that - despite the performance - you’re still left with an old small GMC, which even when new were largely craptastic.

I grew up riding in Wagoneer/Cherokees of various vintages. Unless you’re going to take them off-road, just live vicariously through David Tracy’s experience with his pair (right? He has 2 now?).