Have some stars, you stupid, beautiful bastard.

I still defer to Jim Rome on this one...

Idiots. Should’ve called me; I would’ve done it for $100,000.

That’s true. I haven’t, if for no other reason than I haven’t responded at all because every time I reply to the elder familial MAGAs I wind up on the phone with one of them for like an hour.

The conservative wing of my family—that is to say, the generation above mine—has begun to pull something similar lately. They have responded to my progressive criticisms of the current government by saying, paraphrased, “if you don’t like it you should run for office.” Nevermind that I work in a field with ridiculous…

This does not go far enough. Mighty Ducks is a piece of shit movie. The aggregate trilogy comprises the worst story arc in all of hockey film.

I haven’t made my bracket, but I can unequivocally say this—despite not having seen Moana: anyone who advances Frozen out of the first round is wrong.

RIP that Juggernaut I spent all of my birthday iTunes cards to get before his boxes went away.

That’s one thing I don’t suspect with PoGo: in a little under two years, they’ve only rolled out three out of seven generations (and, before this week, had no storyline whatsoever); it’s not unreasonable to think that they’ve got at least three more years worth of content (assuming that Gen8 comes out late next year,…

Or, in the case of multiple games I’ve played (Star Wars Uprising, Avengers Alliance 1 & 2), they still have a decent player base but the devs pull the plug anyway!

Poor Rein is too large to dodge, dip, dive, duck or dodge...

Tis a great feeling to invite your friends to PASS INTO THE IRIS in the middle of an enemy Zarya ult while enemy Reaper/Soldier/Hanjo ults bounce harmlessly off your comrades.

Few things please me more than getting right behind a panicked shield-up Rein and positively melting him with disco-orb-orb-orb-orb-orb-orb. Either he drops his shield to try and hit me and my teammates drop him or he keeps the barrier up and I dodgeball him to death.

I’ve recently realized the power of Zen as a dead serious Tracer stopper. I’m a high gold/low plat PS4 player and—unless I’m playing Sym or Winston—Tracers just kick my ass nonstop. Lately, however, I’ve been able to roast Tracers that get too close to me by backpedaling to draw them in and then wreck their shit with…

When it comes to practice, Arcade Arcade Arcade.

Plays a lot of Sym? Naomi Osaka: Gold rank confirmed.

I witnessed a teen suggest an entire sports team ghost ride their bus last week. I was genuinely blown away he knew what that was.

“It’s Wonderful to Watch” should’ve told you differently

Waiting for #PleaseLikeMySport twitter to erupt into “WELL, IN HOCKEY...”