If Rachel Roy is the Zodiac Killer, and Ted Cruz is the Zodiac Killer, does that mean that Rachel Roy is Ted Cruz?

I feel like they are kardashian-level trolling everyone.

honey, no.

“it seems like the same idea as serial killers, like they can’t keep their exploits quiet and that’s how they get caught.”

Ask North Carolina how “taking care of morality" has helped their economy...

Shapiro’s is fucking amazing. I’m glad I’m nowhere near it right now, but oh my god. Look at how much meat they put on your sandwich! And the cheesecake is twice that size! Oy gevalt so good!

This whole thing is probably a blessing in disguise for some partners. Forget the cheating bit, who wants to be married to someone dumb enough to use their real credit card instead of one of those anonymous Visa gift cards?

I still don’t understand the point of this website. If you’re already lying to your wife about cheating, why not just go on Tinder and lie there too? You’ll get a MUCH bigger pool of people to choose from, and it’s not like being open and honest with your fuck buddy cancels out cheating on your spouse.

There’s nothing sex-positive about cheating.

True Story: A bro in my office said that he thinks that these cheaters should sue AM for the amount of money that their wives got in the divorce that resulted from this leak.

Good lighting and with my arms raised above my head at all times

Uh no. My boobs would just flop through the open space on the bottom. No one who needs to wear a bra can wear this.

I’m going to be Nina Garcia and say “I don’t know who this girl is. Where is she going?”

Especially because people who fear change are more likely to have to use bills anyway!

Actually Harriet Tubman or Zoe Saldana as Harriet Tubman?

How is there a Key and Peele for every topic? You’d think their show was on for like 15 years or something.

Im just annoyed that he has this much time and money to bother us all with this mess.

celebs don’t have to be role models. they don’t have to be politically aware. they don’t have to be rational and intelligent.

I believe that unicorns come in a variety of colors. I believe that it’s currently raining avocados. I believe that my kitchen floor is cleaning itself, right now.

I say knee length skirts don’t take it far enough. We should put girls in burkas.