I’m also willing to believe that he just doesn’t have a personality beyond sticking his dick in things.

I’m gonna give you all the deductions you can handle! Read more

“I’m just going to roll this over into an offshore account... AND YOU’RE GOING TO LIKE IT!”

You’ll never be able to convince me that this wasn’t perpetrated by a secret consortium of St. Louisians desperate to shed the title of “home to the worst ‘pizza’ ever”

Two things I absolutely do not want on my pizza:

Sweet sauce Read more

Yeah, I was expecting some formic based racism or one of the ants saying that Hitler at least kept his hill in order or something.

I can’t fathom cooking along to vinyl, flipping an LP every 4ish songs while actively cooking sounds like a recipe for disaster (pun not intended). Read more

Ok.. I’ll be up front with it... I smoke weed and I like buffets, they go hand in hand.I love to get all roasty toasty and hit up the Golden Corral for a taco, some cottage cheese and a pile of brownies and ice cream. Read more

Not species. Cultuvars or varietals. The domestic apple is a single species, the different types we see at stores are the equivalent of dog breeds. Selectively bred within that species. Read more

the email. the email. uh uh. the email. Read more

They've had lots of practice refining their writing, since they've been working on shows like Yo Gabba Gabba, Aquabats, Wander Over Yonder, and Gravity Falls in the past few years.

You know, honestly, that song isn’t bad. I also remember spending so many hours listening to the voicemails on Homestar Runner. Fond memories, man. It feels pretty rare seeing as much effort and commitment as was put into HSR into any amateur internet productions these days. Although, maybe I’m just looking in the… Read more

It’s like there’s an entire class of cuisine that was conceived in a bomb shelter. Read more

They’ve been downplaying the epidemic and pretending it doesn’t concern them for awhile, now, and they even sent doctors to help in Italy to show how confident they are. But just recently the number of confirmed cases exploded in spite of the government’s best efforts to prevent people from getting tested properly,… Read more

What is less of a conspiracy theory is that it’s likely a f*ckup of the Wuhan lab, and not a culinary adventure gone wrong. Read more

Let’s say, just for fun, that the Covid global pandemic is purely and only a secret plot to prevent Trump from being reelected.
Read more

Never ascribe to malice what is more easily explained by idiocy. Read more

You weren't wrong about these being a pain in the ass, but you were also 100% right about them being amazing. I stuck to the original recipe, but also added a thick schmear of apple butter and later frosted them with whipped almond cream cheese frosting. Thanks for recipes! 

To my dismay, I discovered too late into the game that I actually did not have a dough hook as I had thought. I used the regular KitchenAid paddle, beat it for a slightly less time, and it still worked great. I also used the whole package of cream cheese, cuz I didn’t want to have a quarter of a brick left over. Also…

Good to see you followed the most important rule of cinnamon roll making: no damn raisins!