Scatter a few “classys” or some “the classiest” and you’re spot on.

I hope this means we’ll never have to hear about Avenatti 2020 ever again.

Wasn't Australia the very first ally he offended? 

It's another silver lining as a result of Sessions being gone. Prison reform has been a bipartisan issue for a while now, but Sessions still views drug crimes as akin to murder.

Its startling to see it laid out so plainly like this

You know his conversation with Jerry Brown went more like this: “You know I won the popular vote in your state, right? Why did you let those 10 million illegals vote? I mean, they probably would have voted for me if it weren’t for Chuck and Nancy. You know Chuck and Nancy, right? They both told me I’m the most…

Meanwhile in France:

Democrats picked up at least 34 seats in the House, the most in a generation.

Yeah, I got actual chills! That doesn’t usually happen to me just by looking at a photo. Also, just heard that Kyrsten Sinema has been officially declared the victor in AZ!

Equally heartwarming: when Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez said she could’t afford to get a place in DC until she started being paid as a member of Congress (she’s broke), Chef Jose Andres tweeted “Dear Congresswomen: you have a room, a shower, and a plate on my family table for as long as you may be in need of one.”

That image pure gold - star for you.

That squad photo you got the old man picture in the background. Staring hard. I can just imagine Trump looking through the eye holes in the picture mad as hell. Like the wandering eyes in the intro for Scooby-Doo.

This actually made me emotional.

A guy I know drove Martin Short years ago. The driver mentioned he was trying to be a comedic actor and he was inspired by Father of the Bride. Martin calls up Steve Martin to give the driver some advice. When they get to the destination Martin lied and said the driver was his son so they could have dinner together: I …

I was living in the town where they filmed Little Giants in the early 90's. So I saw him a couple of times walking down the street. Which I thought was impressive until I found out that my dad (who lived in the same town and was a limo driver) had driven Rick a few times. He said that Rick was one of the most…

I can’t tell any of my best stories because they’re doxxing. Here’s one of the worst.

For some reason I’m cracking up about frequently running into an angry Vanilla Ice.

Aww, this is great. He always seemed like a good dude.

I’ve met/seen/bumped into more celebrities than I can count and unless I’m actually at an event/meal/hangout type thing (where interaction is acceptable) I follow “New York code” and presume they’re living their lives and ignore them like I would any other New Yorker.

At my very first job in NYC (pre-9/11) I had gotten into a terrible fight with the office manager. I was super pissed and left the office to use my flip phone to call a friend in rage while I went out and had a smoke. I hastily threw open the front door to the building and ran into a tall, handsome man with a…