I think you're wildly misinterpreting this post. This isn't saying "Okay, it's safe to ignore people who are flailing because that doesn't really count." It's saying "Hey, drowning might be more subtle than you think it is, so you should ALSO watch for this."

Chuck Norris is the one flying. Not the planes. They are simply strapped to his boots.

4.8 miles per second? Sounds like the other tomatoes need to ketchup.

Correct me if I'm wrong but this is a speeding ticket, not a ticket for wearing GG. Yes she was cited for wearing GG, but the ultimate reason she was pulled over was for speeding.