I can’t look at that guy without remembering some article that a woman wrote about his big smelly cheesy dick.

I’m starting to think ‘sources’ are just Tumblr fans.

I got about half way through and ended up clicking the Vevo link to Sia’s The Greatest.

Can we just admit the biggest tragedy on 9/11 was the death of Andy Whitfield in 2011?

My mom would be okay with this package

For when my ex is literally drowning at the end

YES and I’m terribly pee-shy so it’s like a standoff between two stalls to see who leaves first. It’s usually me with a full bladder. How can I convince corporate to start playing music in the bathroom?

Same. I need that thin cotton buffer between skin and sheets.

After the broadcast, Robach released a statement explaining she had meant to say “people of color.”

If you fly Southwest, you can pick your own seats when you embark on the plane. Someone may be kind enough to let you have the bulkhead seat if you’re clearly a giant.

Southwest is my jam. I never had a problem with their seats being small but I’d gladly take a smaller seat if it means two free checked bags AND snacks. Spirit was all around the worst flight in every aspect. Their seats don’t even recline ffs!

Aren’t women least likely to kill their kids with a gun? They’ll poison, drown, or start a fire for a ‘peaceful’ or less messy death. If they shoot or stab, they’ll also trash the house to make it look like an intruder did it. I watch too much ID.

During the recession it seemed like family murder/suicides were on the rise, especially after the husband lost his job. I just don’t get it.

Sometimes when I flake I’ll see all the fun they’re having on snapchat and get the FOMO. But then I’ll see they’re still going hard with 3am snaps and am glad I stayed home.

I have a friend that agrees to EVERYTHING with such excitement and vigor that you go ahead and buy her ticket only to find out she forgot she works that day and can’t get the day off.

I always thought Rose should have hooked up with the hot Italian guy.

Taylor sounds like me when I was at that age where I had difficulty telling people ‘no’.

If you get arrested and your phone confiscated by police, would they still be able to access your phone if you have a passcode on it?

For anyone who doesn’t have Spotify, like myself

I don’t either. It sounds like she laid out exactly what she wanted in a relationship (marriage, babies, picket fence) and after 15 months he still wasn’t on board. She jumped ship and was rescued by the HMS Hiddles.