“deadlocked Senate, President”

Please, please, please refridgerate your American eggs. Our eggs are washed and lose the protective layer that allows them to be stored at room temp.

FIFA is going to be looking to do at least one clean bid before going back to outright blatant theft; so why not fill up the FIFA coffers with stacks and stacks of 100,000 seat NFL stadium gate receipts with the accompanying massive US broadcast contract.

Over 100 million people travel to and from Latin America every year. The extra 500,000 people traveling to Rio won’t make any difference in the spread of this disease. The only way to “stop” Zika is local vector control.

Didn’t we just takedown the Yankee’s a couple months ago for it’s market cornering e-ticket strategy. If I buy a ticket, I should have the right to re-sell it to whomever I want for however much I want. I can understand the desire to weed out bots, but let’s not chop off our nose to get rid of a zit.

Nope

You know, for a while, I used to be like you, pissed off that my hands always smelled like garlic after I cooked. Then after I noticed myself constantly sniffing my hands all night after cooking I realized that I actually like the smell. Thanks to mincing garlic, I’ve basically turned into Molly Shannon.

I don’t get it. What is Ottowa? Is that from game of thrones or something?

Unfortunately it’s flooding down in Texas so he had to cancel his appearance.

Was I the only one half expecting to see the starting lineup of the LA Lakers feature prominently on this list?

Honestly, I think we’re going to find out that Smith or his woman instigated the altercation by yelling at the guy who hit them. I’m not in anyway trying to justify shooting someone over a traffic accident, but I can never understand the people who feel the need to get into an argument over a fender bender. Is trying…

“As someone debating between moving to Austin or Houston, what’s so bad about the people in Austin?” - Unfortunately it has been colonized by people like you. I’m sorry to say this to you, because I’m sure you’re nice and all, but let’s just say Donald Trump wants to put the wall on the wrong border. It should go on…

Yep exactly this. Buzz it off, do nothing other than wash my head until the hair starts looking like it needs one of those little combs, then buzz it off again. Don’t forget all the money you save on shampoo. I also shave my face at the same time, but that hair seems to grow twice as fast, so I have to give a…

Fuck Napalm. When it comes to oak trees:

Awwww, I’ll do blow with you on your next trip to Vegas.

If by blow, you mean snorting stuff up my nose...hell yeah!!! Flonase, flonase, flonase, flonase, flonase, flonase, flonase, flonase, flonase, flonase, flonase, flonase, (...or nasocort). The 2nd gen antihistamines like Claratin and Allegra can get me through mountain cedar and elm season, but only through the miracle…

I think you pretty much nailed it. Fuck cigars.

I know exactly what you mean Giri. I love the hot stuff and I’m constantly trying to get that perfect burn. Ride the crest at the top of your heat wave so to speak. It used to be medium salsa. Chip after chip it burns a little, makes you sweat, makes you want to eat more. Then you step it up. Grab the picante with the…

Starting 5: Curry, Kawhi, Durant, LeBron, Draymond

That’s just how San Antonian’s answer stupid questions. We don’t buy championships or freedom...we earn them.