I really love how this game manages to make you stop and go "I don't wanna go in there," every time an entrance into an unknown room shows up. I'm never excited to see what;s around the next corner; I'm always dreading turning the blood-soaked corner or going down the narrow, gore-splatter corridor. I fucking love…

Mr. Shore Patrol has a problem, but he won't admit is as he is in DENIAL.

That chick is like, the Pele of anal.

Night vision goggles are for night jigglin'.

I feel like that's the TV show I never knew I wanted. Would there be a How I Met Your Mother episode? Because I'd really love to see Marshall brutalize everyone in that show with a claw hammer.

Godammit, why would you ruin Crocodile Rock like that? Fuck, now what am I going to drunkenly sing along to?

I watched that Boston Legal episode just last night. Man, I love that show.

Amnesiac is my favorite Radiohead album, but I can understand why people don't like it. Half the songs are depressing walls-of-sound (Morning Bell, I Might be Wrong, Knives Out) and the other half are just depressing (Like Spinning Plates, Hunting Bears, etc). I'm a secretly super-depressed guy, though, so I'm…

That should read "Nah, who am I kidding? Everyone knows, Flav's eye for business is as good as his taste in fashion." Goddamn typos ruining my goddamn internet zingers, something something Obama.

Right? I mean, of all the places, he chose Iowa— Iowa! I'm sure all 17 black families will try it once, but that can hardly sustain a chicken joint. It's like this is some kind of publicity stunt and not an actual business venture or something….

I just love to see everyone pick on Jerry.

"Kind of a house but kind of falling apart- yeah, that describes your life right now."

He's got swedish meatballs made of genital warts!

Papes N' Vapes

Uncooked, I honestly don't give a shit if he has a lot of friends or not- that's not what I'm judging. I'm saying is that he comes off as an asshole in most of his works, and as a general rule, I don't like assholes. White knight all you want, but that's not going to change the image he puts out with stuff like…

I Wish I Had Titties, a jelloem by the great Bill Cosby Bukowski.

I liked Rudd's character. Actually, I just like Rudd in general. He just seems like a down to earth dude who I could get drunk and watch Star Trek with. Plus, he was on Tim and Eric and wore silly costumes and danced— what's not to love?

Is it just me, or is the gerbil becoming more and more racist?

I believe you are forgetting Cowboy Bebop. "The Real Folk Blues pt. 2" is one of my favorite series endings of all time.

Daria, on the other hand, has aged horribly. I don't know how I sat through as many episodes as I did when I was young(er). I watched a few episodes with a pal a few weeks ago, and that monotone they all speak in made me want to tear my ears off and throw them into the fireplace. Even on drugs, it still made me…