"Freshen yer drinks, guv'nor?"

#TortiSoWhite

Also cheesy and occasionally saucy.

Welcome to 1986, everyone!

I don't want to be that person, and I know there's only a limited amount of information to convey, but this is just the Variety article slightly reworded, and with the reference to Variety's review (written by Sonia Sarayia, ironically enough) removed.

WOOF!

He's already been the butt of numerous jokes.

It's a GJI about nothing!

His tattoo's a total bummer.

Well, if that's a lady Deep Dish Pizza, she probably needs to see a doctor.

If Amy and Nick hosted an American version of Bake-Off, I would totally be on board with it.

It was over ten years ago, believe it or not. That is, more Simpsons episodes have been made since than were made in the entire golden era.

Absolutely. Supposedly he would regale his fellow barflies with exaggerated stories about his heroics.

And yet if I find tomato in my Caesar Salad, IT IS NOT A CAESAR SALAD.

A hot dog felating a slice of deep-dish pizza.

Wasn't it Todd Flanders who was a torso?

A series that exposed exactly how much of Ness's legacy was a creation of the popular media, and the fact that the real Ness was a drunk and a pretty crappy crimefighter, would be fascinating.

Where 'formalwear' means 'wearing a tie with your Hawaiian shirt and beanie'.

But how will your friends know to envy you otherwise?

The correct answer is "… GANGNAM STYLE!"