It shatters my chakras and crumples my flow!

Fine for a little dirt or people who sweep often. I just get the feeling the amount of dog hair I sweep up once a week will clog this machine.

I was not sad when that shill kicked the bucket. She simultaneously spread false hope and misery. Fuck her.

saying “lol” as a word (“lawl”) is WAY worse in my book!

So, you tap your watch to make your phone fart?

There are too many apps that show the time, so your app called “WatchFace” has been rejected. We noticed your app primarily shows the time. We do not accept apps that show you the time on AppleWatch.

Until you learn that more people are watching the video with their smart phone - then it's brilliant!

Open the store cupboard door, HAL.

FTFY

gambit > gamut

I don’t get the food science behind it but GOOD GOD were they delicious and worth the derp moments. I’ve made this dish for a few family gatherings since and it’s always a hit.

While part of me says that’s wrong because what if you get a Sprite, the other part of me says it makes a decent amount of sense because that’s not different from my in-laws referring to all tissues as “Kleenex” or my mother (and me probably more than I realize) calling the act of vacuuming “Hoovering.”

We have both kinds, country and western.

“Naked and Afraid” is what I call my bedroom.

I’m assuming they mean “in its genre”. ;)

So it’s made with ice cream instead of bullshit?

Since when is “dipping something out” a proper term? “Dipping” alone implies putting something into something just a little and quickly; scooping is taking something out.

This makes no sense and I do not accept your regionalism.

Regarding Jamie Layton’s deli worker I thought I knew where that story of ‘pink meat’ was going but was thankfully incorrect. It did, however, remind me of something a friend said to me once after watching with disapproval as I once again ordered my burger well-done, “You’d send back Catherine Zeta-Jones ‘cuz she’s…

Brought that alcohol flavored whipped cream once, and two seconds in it was instantly clear it was a bad idea. I tried the urban decay body glitter - overrated. Lingerie seemingly overrated - it seemed like it was more for my shopping habits than it was for his pleasure. He was more into the really dirty stuff that…

It's about the process of eating it as much as it is about the flavor. I like trying to bite into it right at the edges where the colors meet... it appeals to a weirdly detail-oriented part of my brain...