Damn, when Sascha Baron Cohen's wife is mortified on your behalf, you should really reevaluate your life and all the choices that got you to this point in it.

Hate speech is not covered by the First Amendment. Let me break this down reaaaaal nice and simple for you:

I agree. I think part of the problem with cases like these is not just that it's a group of teenage boys acting like...I really can't even think of a word to describe what they do, but that so many others (like Steubenville) were in some way complicit in facilitating it, covering it up, normalizing it, etc. That, at…

Tori Spelling says she would nerver erver sell her sex tape.

God this is just a thing of absolute beauty.

Well damn, if that's the case I'd probably throw down with the guy too!

Like Tatariffic mentioned, you really do have to want to change in order to do so; given Brown's usual attitude of "everyone hates me and I don't know whyyyyy" my thought is that jail, and then rehab of some sort would be the best way to get through to him.

I've been feeling that more and more recently; "Man, I wonder what Ebert would think about [insert movie here]." He really was one my favorites, and I miss him greatly!

I got a fairly mixed bag, just outside Chicago:

I just gotta say, that lead picture of Kanye is absolutely cracking me the hell up in reference to the blurb. You couldn't have picked a better picture to describe, "Oh damn."

Unfortunately, these lunatics represent (both legislatively and realistically) a very vocal subset of Amurrica that is just as backwards, racist, sexist, homophobic, close-minded, reactionary, and Bible-thumping as it was 150 years ago. They had gone relatively quiet over the past 50 years because it was no longer…

Well goodness, I do hope they're gluten-free dumplings!

That gif is mesmerizing...

"We’re human beings and the sun is the sun — how can it be bad for you? I don’t think anything that’s natural can be bad for you."

Callie: I think maybe it's a "two birds, one stone" sort of reference? It's either that or President Clinton is about as dirty of a man as I think we all expected.

I feel like Kris Jenner is the most brilliant, soulless person alive: first she launches her daughter's career (along with the rest of her "brand," known by most other humans as a family) and continues its existence through a constant barrage of magazine covers filled with pre-arranged pap shoots. Then Kim goes and…

Ooh, give their Green Tea Scrub a try; the exfoliant is really fine (as compared to the previously-mentioned crushed glass feeling), the green tea seems to help my super sensitive skin from getting pissy due to said exfoliation, and a little bit goes a long way. I've been recommending like crazy because I've yet to…

Haha, that was an excellent transcription! I think part of the weirdness is caused by her outfit's illusion netting (that see-through stuff used in figure skating costumes) stretched across her chest area, which ends just below her collar bone - the extra bout of Photoshop doesn't really help matters, either.

Yeah! I kept scrolling through the comments after each "Ryan Lochte is dumb HAHA" article, wondering if I was the only person feeling skeeved out - sure as hell felt like it at the time, at least. That article in particular was the one I was looking for because it was just so uncomfortable. Not only was one of this…

Ryan Lochte was an American Olympic swimmer who became relatively famous during the 2012 Summer Olympics and had a reality TV series on E!. He is not the most adept public speaker and isn't really known for his intellectual prowess by any stretch; however, during this time period and for a while after Jezebel had a…