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Amazing news, Disney fans.

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Disney has unveiled a new mass grave
where fans can be buried alive

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with their favorite characters forever.

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The experience allows customers
of all ages to get thrown into a large 200

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acre pit where they'll suffocate alongside
Mickey, Minnie and all of their pals.

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Well, tickets cost a pretty penny.

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Customers say you just can't

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put a price on dying in the dirt along
Snow White and her seven Dwarves.

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Mass grave slots are selling out quick.

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But don't worry, because Disney
is hoping to expand the experience soon

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with even more characters
including Star Wars, Marvel and Pixar

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versions, as well as an express line
to skip ahead to the afterlife.

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Even faster.

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President Biden has given the nation

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the nuclear launch codes
just in case anything ever happens to him.

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The president promised
he wasn't going anywhere soon,

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but said whenever he did, U.S.

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citizens needed to be ready to oversee
the country's 5000 nuke defense arsenal.

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Biden also asked Americans
to please write the codes down

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so they don't forget them.

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Then announce the codes to one of the most
devastating weapons as follows.

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3x524980.

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Immediately after the press conference,
the President asked that no one.

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As an ally to the black community.

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I believe in doing the right thing.

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Always as allies, it isn't enough
to just be passively accepting.

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We have to stand up against racism
in all its ugly forms,

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which is why I, as an anti-racist
ally, refuse

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to say absolutely
any word that starts with the letter N.

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I'll admit it.

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Growing up I used to say words
that start with end all the time,

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and I see any C, k, and O,
but I was ignorant.

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I was racist

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and I'm sorry.

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Today I know better.

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I'm educated.

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I know what it means to be a true
anti-racist ally to the black community.

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And that means never

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refusing
to ever say any word that starts with n.

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I believe anyone who claims to be an ally
to black people, but then continues

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to use words that start with n
isn't a true ally at all.

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I mean, you might be asking,
did a black person tell me to do this now?

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Because the black community shouldn't

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have to tell us to stop saying words
like naked.

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That's on us.

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Maybe like me.

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You were raised to think it was okay
to say words that start with n.

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Well, it's time to unlearn that.

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For instance, instead of saying.

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I'm hungry for any s.

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Try saying.

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I'm hungry for cheesy chips.

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It can be exhausting educating people,

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but it is such a small step
that can make a huge difference.

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For example,
once I was at a restaurant with a friend

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and she tried to order and I c.

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S I interrupted her
and I tried to tell her that

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they're called cheesy chips,
but she got defensive and argumentative.

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She said that since Spanish is her first
language, she should be allowed to say no.

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And so

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I said,
Well, maybe you should speak English.

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I think if a black person had been there,
they would have shaken my hand

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and said,
Thank you for calling them cheesy chips.

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It isn't easy being an ally.

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You might even lose friends.

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But at the end of the day,
I'm proud to say

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I always stand up for what I believe in.