WEBVTT

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- We're gathered here
today to remember the life

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and legacy of our dearly departed
friend, the Jeep Renegade.

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After eight arduous model
years on sale in the US,

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dear Stellantis has decided

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to pull the proverbial
plug on the tiny, compact,

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very cute crossover.

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Now, let's take a minute to look back

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at some of the highlights of the Renegade.

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There are exactly two of them.

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It came with a manual
transmission for a little while.

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And you know what?

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That's cool, it's gone.

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It died many years before.

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Like a bad leg, it had to be taken away.

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But then also just look at it.

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It is, as some people
would say, friend shaped,

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but it still had that American toughness

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that cheap buyers have come to expect.

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Now what do we have to settle for?

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The Compass?

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I don't care.

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It doesn't look as pretty.

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Look at those little,
look at its little eyes.

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They're so beautiful.

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And now they've been shuttered forever.

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Unless you live in other
parts of the world,

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because it's gonna
continue to be sold there.

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But in the US and Canada, she's dead.

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After a moment of silence,

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I'd like to read a passage
from the X Ambassador's

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Renegade, a beautiful song that happened

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to come out oddly the same year
as our dearly departed Jeep.

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And I say, hey, hey, hey, hey.

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Living like we're renegades.

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Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.

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Living like we're renegades.

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Renegades, renegades.

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Renegades.

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(engine revving)

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(gentle music)