WEBVTT

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- I am prejudiced against

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because I'm a rich, white billionaire.

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If I'm just the the
average guy down the block,

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they're not pulling me in.

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- I'm glad somebody's
finally speaking the truth.

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A lot of white billionaires
are friends with me.

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I have great taste in
music. I get it anyway.

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I feel bad for Erse. He's
my friend. Set a tough year.

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His whale died. Let's take a
look at the most famous white

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billionaire arrests number four.

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I miss him dearly. Bernie
Madoff ran the largest Ponzi

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scheme in history, defrauding
investors of billions

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and ruined the New York Mets
celebrity net worth has his

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income at negative $17 billion.

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I get it. Technically,
the money was never his,

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but for a while it was.

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In 2009, Madoff pleaded
guilty to 11 federal felonies

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and was sentenced to 150 years in prison.

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A little too much. I'd say they
say it was the Ponzi scheme,

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but I'd say he was
being prejudiced against

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because he is a white billionaire.

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He died April 14th, 2021.

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Rest in power came number three,

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white former billionaire, Martha Stewart.

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In the year 2000,

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after she took her company
public, she became the first

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self-made female billionaire
in the United States.

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Then she was arrested
for lying about her sale

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of I'm clone stock and later
served five months in prison.

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Now, my friend Martha, is
sadly only worth $400 million.

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That poor, poor woman,

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and again, the cops
clearly prejudiced against.

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This white billionaire
woman had an ax to grind.

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Number two, Jim Erse, the owner
of the Indianapolis Colts,

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who's worth about $4.3 billion
arrested for ADUI in 2014.

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He inherited his fortune
from his dad, Robert Erse.

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I feel bad for Jim. It's been tough

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being a white billionaire.

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Number one, America's white
billionaire, Donald Trump.

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In 2015, my friend Donald Trump,

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claimed he was worth $9 billion.

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That number, even then, was
maybe a little inflated.

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Now, Forbes estimates his
worth at $2.6 billion.

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He was arrested earlier
this year for his efforts

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to overturn the 2020 election.

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But you know what I think?
I think it was the cops.

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Yeah, the cops were
prejudiced against him.

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I'm tired of all these cops coming

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after my white billionaire friends.

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I'm not gonna have any friends left.

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Who am I gonna go to the vineyard with?

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Who am I going to the
Hamptons with this year?

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I'm so thankful the year's almost over.

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Thanks for watching and
stick with Deadspin. I.