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The Capitol is on
lockdown after Dianne Feinstein got a gun.

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Levels of concern for the senator reached
new heights yesterday when she slowly

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wheeled into the senate chamber
holding a nine mm semiautomatic handgun.

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The 89 year old reportedly
waved the gun around, claiming that

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there were, quote, terrorists in the attic
that had been poisoning her food.

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As of now, Feinstein has yet to surrender

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the gun and has executed several senators
who have called for her resignation.

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Feinstein's death
toll is currently unknown.