WEBVTT

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A team of archeologists have uncovered
an ancient race of skeleton people.

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Experts believe the skinless organless
skeletons populated the Nile Delta region,

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an estimated 6000 years ago and bear
numerous similarities to humans today.

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These bone creatures
may even be our earliest ancestors,

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possibly interbreeding with our species,
which would make all humans part skeleton.

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Airbnb has begun testing a new feature
for their platform to allow black guests.

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This week, the rental giant Soft launched
a new platform feature that finally lets

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African-American users take advantage of
the company's short term rental services.

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This feature is currently being beta test
in major cities, but Airbnb has stated

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their aspirations to expand this feature
nationwide, according to Airbnb reps.

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Black people will still need to check
a box confirming that they are black,

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but once done
they'll be welcome to rent home

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So long as they promise
not to steal anything.

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I can't wait to start using Airbnb.

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Like for a lot of people,

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money has been a little tight around here
recently, but luckily today

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I have the perfect recipe that keeps both
my stomach and my pocketbook satisfied.

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Its five tortilla chips
with ketchup in a bowl.

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Now I'm using a bowl here, but
don't let that scare you away in a pinch.

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Eating this straight off the table
or even the floor will taste just as good.

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First, you're going to want to add
your tortilla chips.

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I like to break them up into pieces
to make it

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feel like you're eating more chips
than you actually are.

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Now grab as many free ketchup packets
as you can and add to taste.

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At this point, you can pop the bowl
in the microwave to make the ketchup hot.

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But if you're like me and opened

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your microwave for gas money,
feel free to serve as is.

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And if your ungrateful child

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thinks that it looks yucky
or that they ate this yesterday

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and the day before that
and don't want to eat this again.

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Just explain to them that making TikTok
videos all day doesn't pay

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as much as you thought it would
and that Mommy is doing her best

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because mommy wants yummy food, too.

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But Mommy doesn't know
when things are going to get better

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or if things will ever get better. So

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mommy is going to go eat her chips now.

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Calling all Swifties

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Taylor Swift Eras
Tour tickets are still available.

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We have plenty of tickets
left in the back of our van.

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They're really good seats, too, but
you have to get in the van to have them.

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We even have backstage
passes back at our shed.

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Just get in the van
and we'll take you there.

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Get in the van or we will make you get in!