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Idiot Tornado Tears Harmlessly Through Empty Field

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An Idiot tornado that touched down in eastern Nebraska today

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tore harmlessly through a completely empty field

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despite dozens of buildings nearby, onlookers reported

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Witnesses say the moronic cyclone

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just swirled around aimlessly for its meager 45-minute existence

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Missing easy opportunities 

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to toss trailers

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rip up trees

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and even flatten a Dairy Queen

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Locals also reported that it stupidly whiffed on a parking lot full of cars

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by over a mile

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The pathetic storm did try to turn toward a nearby herd of cattle

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but it dissipated before it could get there.