WEBVTT

1
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Employees. Why
are you refusing to return to the office?

2
00:00:02.711 --> 00:00:06.214
For me, I prefer the freedom of being able
to choose where to be miserable from.

3
00:00:06.297 --> 00:00:09.884
Gutting and skinning livestock virtually
is so much easier for my schedule.

4
00:00:09.968 --> 00:00:13.763
I dressed up a mannequin
and sat at my desk in like 2018.

5
00:00:13.888 --> 00:00:16.599
No one has noticed yet,
and I doubt they will start now.

6
00:00:16.599 --> 00:00:18.810
Turns out
my kids are actually pretty cool.

7
00:00:18.810 --> 00:00:20.020
Once you get to know them.

8
00:00:20.020 --> 00:00:23.148
I forgot where our office building is
and I'm too afraid to ask.

9
00:00:23.148 --> 00:00:25.692
All of my most annoying coworkers
survived COVID.

10
00:00:25.775 --> 00:00:26.568
No thanks.

11
00:00:26.568 --> 00:00:29.112
I found it much easier to
masturbate on the clock here.