Kevin Cortez
aolnetscape
Kevin Cortez writes on the internet. He wrote this.
11/13/19
11:37 AM
9

Hard boiled eggs. Trumps every other method I’ve tried. Perfect peel every time. My holiday deviled eggs are going to actually look good this year, instead of looking like they have egg leprosy.
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11/12/19
3:06 PM
658

Shutting down the only dedicated politics website in your portfolio right before the 2020 election, one of the most consequential of our lifetime, kicks into high gear. Essentially shutting down the second-most highly trafficked website in your portfolio because one out of every twenty five posts rankles you. I’m not Read more

11/10/19
7:31 AM
30

Does this mean I have to put up with The Rick and Morty Guy at work again? I don’t need someone in the break room telling me both that I “really have to watch it” and also that “the real jokes” will be over my head, Brandon*! Read more

11/8/19
10:19 PM
1

Ugh. I was randomly looking at those little furbies on Ebay just a few days ago. (I WAS NOT GOING TO BUY ANY.) I used to have a bunch.

And I watched the comedy special “My Favorite Shapes” on HBO literally the second after binge watching Los Espookys because I needed more Julio Torres instantly and he uses some of Read more

11/8/19
2:59 PM
10

Ken M, the internet’s most loveable troll, should have a place on the list. That’s my only complaint. He has a lot better threads but here’s all I can find on short notice.

11/8/19
9:27 AM
15

It’s as insufferable as that one time Jeffrey Epstein didn’t kill himself.

11/8/19
9:22 AM
42

This really puts into perspective how insufferable the internet really is.

10/31/19
4:24 PM
10

Don’t mind me,  I’m just here for the Deadspin flogging. Fascinating stuff.

10/30/19
10:36 PM
1

This seems like as good a place as any to describe how I encountered 90's Memphis tape culture. Few years ago, I became obsessed with this track (it sounds better on headphones than speakers, for some reason):

10/27/19
9:53 PM
900

God, I hope that "lock him up" chant burned its way into his insecure little facsimile of a soul and we get a torrent of rage tweets about it tomorrow. HOOK IT TO MY VEINS!

10/3/19
2:27 PM
7

Theres some gochujang in a squeeze bottle rather than in the tub that tends to be a little thinner.

10/3/18
7:22 AM
40

You exaggerate a little bit, but it’s true UFO catchers and rhythm games occupy most of the space in many arcades. Still, it’d be a shame to lose arcades as it’s, after all, one of the last remaining social spaces out there, for people who don’t drink alcool (and don’t enjoy bars or night clubs).

11/17/09
2:18 PM
1

how about we just cut out the nonsense and all agree that Til the Casket Drops is going to be the best hip-hop album of the year?