At this point in his career he should be eyeing Del Boca Vista instead.

I’m a fat beer drinking slob, so please excuse my naïveté, but isn’t punishing your body like this very detrimental to your long term health?

Chill, Manito-brah.

I guess when you’ve never been to Gary, Indiana you can still see the world through innocent eyes.

The MRSA rule applies when you’re down three limbs at mid-season, you just quit and go home.

I had zero idea that he made an appearance in Electrique Beauxgaloo

You don’t have to understand. Life is going to be okay.

How would I not know and how could you not get this joke?

When I see his name I just say Snake Buttholes.

[Ewing, desperate to relate to his players goes on the internet and reads funny Georgetown story]

This is one of the tricks they teach you at The Second Mile.

Tennis is actually his second calling:

You’d think they’d have glue in abundance.

The Yankees have the Evil Empire, and the Giants have the Virile Empire.

I’m most impressed by the 4 kids with 5 women statistic.

Coming from Collins, you have to take his comments seriously. If it came from DRC or Janoris Jenkins you could take it with a grain of salt since they’re always kidding.

Nice “quote” bro. My copy and paste doesn’t have those freestyle skillz.

Outside-the-box-and-one-and-done

The fine needs to be at least a $Million, preferably 10.

Boca Raton has a lot of amazing early bird specials, okay!