This is not a good time to be a singer in your 60s.

Leo was giving us “Leader of the Pussy Posse” realness last night. He looked good.

Twitter fights are pathetic.

Apparently we were such rubes that we didn’t really have a honeymoon itinerary other than dinner reservations. Out itinerary was something along the lines of “wake up late, have sex, eat breakfast, drink wine, eat food, enjoy the fact that for the first time in 6 months my mom was not calling me to discuss napkin…

Just think, if these people were poor, semi-mentally-incapacitated, and living in small town Wisconsin that kid would already be in jail for life.

But for real, Bobby... that was perfect. The fact that there is nary a proper noun in this article is just.... excellent. I salute you!

Her?

Jessica Simpson “acts as if the world is one big open bar.”

this fuckin guy

Hey Nineteen (to Twenty-four Months, if convicted)

EXCEPT FOR THESE GUNS!!!

I’ve always been a negative in the 1 - 10 looks scale, always knew it, and was reminded of it frequently.

Like elderly fetuses.

They look older than the entire rest of the cast combined.

This will never be more depressing than the time potato stood in for muffins and nobody noticed its time in the spotlight:

omg newborn babies are disgusting.