Go back to Jezebel, Joe. You are not welcome here.

No, I'm not. I don't understand this response?

DON'T BUY BACK YOUR HATRED! YOU'VE GOTTA OWN THAT SHIT!

Not commenters! Real, regular writers. (Drew, Newell, Ley and Albert can be included because they've been out of the commenting game long enough.)

Who is your least favorite Deadspin writer other than yourself, and why?

Where I'm from in @california, guys show love for the neighborhood where they grew up by throwing signs and have ZERO gang affiliation.

1. No

Welcome to Choose Your Own Adventure - Prisoner Reintegration Edition!

+1

Jason Stonebraker - Facebook

Mix butter and cigar or cigarette ashes together to make a paste.

NO LONGER PICTURED: The Boy Who Cried

Oh my. +1

UPDATE 2: But wait! There's more...

UPDATE: Benson responds.

W in at all costs.

Yet another picture from Sochi of somebody with broken facilities.

Where Do Our Winter Olympians Come from?

Nancy Kerrigan auditioned for the role of Walter, but she withdrew herself from consideration after realizing that it was just another pipe dream.

Mike Vick's trash talk was much more pointed during his Falcons days.