Atlanta Braves : Hey, at least we’re not the Philies.

My wife and I opnce spent a friday evening sitting on opposite sides of the same couch texting each other emojis back and forth. She has an iPhone, while I have a Nexus 5. While she drank her wine, and I sipped my bourbon, we compared and contrasted all the differences, and she even rated which dog emojis were cuter…

This happened to me today - but without emojii...

Stop. Linking. Videos.

Oh look. Aston made another Aston that looks exactly like all the other Astons.

You have to stick with the manly man’s Gawker properties narrative: Deadspin and Jalopnik are Good Blogs Frequented By Manly Men Who Have Disdain For Nerds, Geeks, Women, Liberal Hipsters, The Gays And SJWs.

Getting a “Perfect” on the corkscrew in Forza 6 is among my life’s greatest achievements.
#wastedlife

I dunno man. Isn’t this EXACTLY why you brake-check someone? :)

Let me get this straight. This asshole works for his nice things by building companies and providing goods and services that people gladly pay him for and you go out of your way to shit on him. [Which is fair since, as I stated, he can be an asshole]

In America, 2 tons is correctly refereed to as one Rosie Odonnell.

A deeply mediocre team quarterbacked by Nick Foles isn’t exactly a big draw for the citizens of Los Angeles

I’m more interested in skipping directly to the airless colored tires...

After hearing this, a confused Wes Welker showed up in chaps and a leather vest with a lasso in hand.

Feast Mode.

“I’d hit that.”

An 80-year old man was having his annual checkup and the doctor asked him how he was feeling. “I’ve never been better!” he boasted. “I’ve got an eighteen year old bride who’s pregnant and having my child! What do you think about that?”

It’s disappointing and pretty nonsensical that the First Order is essentially more powerful than the Empire only 30 years after it was so intensely crippled. They had to pay reparations to the New Republic but they somehow had enough remaining capital to TURN AN ENTIRE PLANET INTO A WEAPON?!? I feel like the film…

Doctor: “ok how do you spell your name?”

He stole that quote like it was in the seafood section of Publix.

Lions don’t accept opinions of unwilling sexual partners either.