Print newspapers are prehistoric tech. Tipster Fred must be part of a modern stone age family.

I'm not Walk off HBP, but I punched it up on MLB.TV. Epic meltdown by Broxton.

+1

I'll take bowling over "Jim Nantz Remembers Augusta."

His pitch count exceeded his age, so it's good. But teams will be bunting against him.

Rockies commit three errors in one inning behind Moyer. AARP to investigate.

Jump rope. It is good for conditioning, coordination, and auto-erotic asphyxiation.

"Hi. I realize you want to be provocative and edgy. But I'm disappointed in you for not contacting Mr. McDowell."

The way the ball rolled afterwards, it must have missed "Ren" and hit "Stimpy."

+1

I like them. My first thought when I saw the height and weight was to compute the BMI.

Big deal. At least one Cubs fan already walks on water, but he's confident he can cut back on sodium.

At Gawker, do the signs worn by interns (@1:00) say "Warning! Intern!"? They do at my work.

The local manager did not consider them a "closed-toe shoe." I appealed, but failed. That manager is now gone, so I might try again. They're also better known now.

My local gym wouldn't allow me to wear Vibrams, so I stick with Chuck Taylors. When I did use them, they worked fine for weightlifting, especially the big barbell lifts.

1986 was a good year.

I am a very aged type of modern major dip-shit head

Thunder Island. Sock puppet lip sync, if I can get away with it.

It's pretty good buried in the middle of the patty. I looked around for a recipe, and instead found this spicy peanut butter that I may have to try with a burger.

According to the Barna Group, the percentage of people who at first believed abortion should not be legal, but saw Tebow's ad and changed their minds, was twice that of the pro-choice viewers who indicated they changed their mind because of the commercial. But given their survey numbers, we are talking between five…