Nahnsense
Nahnsense
Nahnsense

I had a similar exchange with my mom when I was 17 and she was commentating me loosing my virginity.

Is there anything on Cydia that gives Remote-like functionality for the iPad?

@J Money BS: Don't you remember!? He already preliminarily shot down all short jokes on Deadspin:

@rewards: They don't have hurricanes in that part of the world. Typhoons.

@scoop.and.slam: On the Hudson line by chance? She's short with super light blonde hair? Yeah, I eye-fuck the shit out of her.

I prefer firm big "B"s or little "C"s.

@Gourmet Spud: I second that. Some of the most well-researched and comprehensive sports writing in any medium. I can't believe someone doing this quality of journalism writes anonymously.

The first line of the jump said stepfather. Terrible to falsely accuse someone of sharing half of their genetic code with this guy.

@100percentinjuryrate: I'm really hoping the guys here were smart enough to use a stock picture.

I burnt my brown start once lighting a fart on fire with no pants on. It hurt like hell for a while.

@Varina: I hear you. It was a general complaint. Girls always give you a dirty look when you're going for the obvious read-and-poo.

@Varina: Girls (and guys for that matter) need to get over guys taking reading material to the shitter (not saying that was your specific complaint).

Boy am I jealous of that helicopter seed. Not only is he undoubtedly the most famous maple seed of all time, his one function in life, and the thing he will be most known for, is f*ucking with Phil Mickelson.

Terrific idea Jeremy! I just did the same.