She probably also thinks that goddamned dress is White and Gold.

Bear. BEAR this shit. If you are going to demand perfection from others try not to misspell homonyms while you do so. You made the ghost of George Washington cry.

I haven't had my coffee yet and at first glance I was like, "Well they have the same name and extremely similar backgrou....oh wait."

Oh, fuck this. I'm guessing he was being bullied at his school and the adults couldn't be bothered to do anything to rein in the little shits, just like it was when I was a kid. The excuses were always, "oh, they need to work it out themselves," or "oh, honey, just ignore them, they're jealous," or other bullshit…

I cannot wait for Twitter to fail to get this joke....

Is it wrong to hope this Judge is immortal? Maybe she has a makeup artist to help her with her elder look and truthfully she looks like Julianne Moore underneath it all.....she was turned by Lestat centuries ago and will never leave us. God, this would be an awesome HBO series.

Huck's face when Jake walks in is legit the exact same expression my dog has when I catch him trying to eat cat poop.

No, but I'm gonna leave it.

I just glanced around to see if that's his normal color, and found this. I couldn't resist sharing it. So many questions.

That's it—throw down, right now! Scalia, Thomas, Alito, Roberts: express milk, on the spot. Right now. Do it like your imaginary starving baby depends on it. I want to see each one squeeze out one little drop of white gold.

"Maternity care" is nothing but a hippie racket concocted by granola-munching Left Coasters and New England liberal elites.

Sometimes it helps to look at the same type of scenario with a non-sexual action:

UP IS DOWN BLACK IS WHITE CATS AND DOGS LIVING TOGETHER I DONT UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD ANYMORE

Uhm. I could have a thousand kit kats for what my computer cost but I still need my fucking computer to do my work every day (so I can buy kit kats).

The only vaccine exemptions should be health related. If you don't want to vaccinate your kids then homeschool them. If I can't send my kids to school with PB&J, I damn well shouldn't be able to send them without MMR.

What's next? "American Sniper has too many vowels in its title and causes global warming"?

Yeah, the biggest argument I've seen against smart guns is basically, "but what if a thug has me and my family held at gunpoint and I manage get the gun from him but I don't have the companion wristwatch so I can't shoot him and so his companions kill my whole family?"

I think the shocker here is going to be Roberts writing the opinion and it will probably be 6-3 in favor of gay marriage.

Sometimes I wish the Constitution were more black and white. Like, I wish it would flat out just say in plain English: "No State shall make or enforce any law which shall abridge the privileges or immunities of citizens of the United States." Then we wouldn't have to deal with all this mess...