I'm really glad to have read this. I was one of the confused ones at the beginning, but you explained everything really well. I can honestly say that I learned something today, which I also appreciate. Thank you for sharing!

In this case, I don't blame Spotify at all. Tool refuses to cooperate with any of the streaming services or online music sellers because they believe that the quality of their music suffers in mp3 format. So if you want to hear Tool, you will probably have to keep buying cd's or vinyl.

As one of those kids myself, I would apologize but I never actually spilled the beans to anyone. I didn't want to hurt anyone's feelings. My little brother told his entire pre-k class though. I thought it was funny then and I still do. We both got plenty of presents as kids, just without the deceit, fwiw.

"Approachable" coffee is coffee that is not very complex in flavor. Basically, it just tastes like "coffee". It doesn't really have many other flavors in it other than the generally agreed-upon coffee taste.

Am I the only person here who isn't offended by the coffee hipster story? I go to a shop like this every day and I didn't find anything wrong with that story at all. I probably would have responded the same way as the narrator did. (Full disclosure: I've never worked in a coffee shop, but I do go to a pretentious…

Second, most insurance policies don't cover over the counter medications, and without insurance, birth control would cost most women $600 a year or so, which means this is a sneaky way for conservatives to pretend to be pro-woman in theory but in practice actually advocate the same shit they were advocating before —…

...his farts must sound like moos.

The only good thing about this particular form of communicable stupidity is that one of the symptoms is that men who are infected with it feel compelled to wear t-shirts that say things like "DADD: Dads Against Daughters Dating". (Yes, there are people who sell these shirts and men who buy/wear them. Ew.)

I was born on an Army base to a mother who was enlisted at the time. She actually doesn't have too many complaints about her experience serving in the Army, but she did note that the prevailing attitude amongst some of the officers was "If Uncle Sam had wanted you (soldier) to have a family, he'd have issued you one."…

Grapefruits are very tasty but I can't have them since they contain an enzyme that can interfere with the efficacy of birth control pills. FROWNY FACE.

Red, white and blue BACON fat. Yes, I know people who would do this.

I currently live in the South and I can verify that ranch dressing is combined with EVERYTHING here. I totally believe this story too...