Not to mention, you can think Trayvon Martin's murder was wrong and also think it's wrong that this baby, and Natalie Holloway and whatever other white-victim-of-the-week you want to name were murdered.

Yet are Catherine O'Hara and John Candy nothing?

Wow, Chris Brown is gonna be hella disappointed when he finds out beating cancer isn't what he thinks it is.

"We wanted to check off "MEET CHRIS BROWN" from one lucky child's want list by granting them an up close and personal meeting with Brown himself and VIP access to one of the concerts taking place in Halifax, Winnipeg or Toronto", says Kathy Brewer, publicist for Wantster, "We knew that since this child would be going…

NEVER NEVER NEVER HAVE SEX, even if you want to.

Betty Humpter, meanwhile, said she felt the justice system had failed.

Is it weird for anybody else to simultaneously loathe and love 'Murica tonight?

So what USA Today intern is getting blamed for this?

Well, if there's one guy who can be seen as the voice of reason in all of this it's Howie Felterbush. He knows all there is to know about incorrectly fingering someone.

Way back in 1910, when Abraham Felterbuschenbaum arrived on the steamship from Gdansk with his young wife to start a new life in the United States, he just knew something wasn't right when the immigration officer told him, through barely-contained giggles, he was getting a more American-sounding name.

are you asking out of incredulousness (dang ignorant kids these days! foo!-shakes cane)

If he was able to catch two passes from Tebow, it's clear that he has longer arms than the law.

She is now the first person in history to be happy to step on a Lego.

I did not know why, but I logged onto Facebook today to find that I had several nasty messages from strangers all shouting about the "gay agenda". My personal favorite was the man who lumped homosexuals (you could almost imagine him whispering the word as he furtively typed it), in with all things evil. Among the…

This shot is pretty awesome. It reminds me of the famous photo of Babe Ruth's last game:

I'm experiencing some sort of hardwired failure of logical thinking. I just need to put that in my mouth.

That is hilarious and adorable and makes me want to go hug somebody.

Jon's getting more silver foxy every day. I approve, I approve.

This needs to be a bumper sticker or something: "If your regime is not strong enough to handle a joke, then you don't have a regime." -JS

Literally just yesterday, I decided that the first of three questions I will ask a new guy I hope to sleep with is what their position on abortion is. Because FUCK THAT if they think they're gonna try to bully me into having a baby when I'm just trying to get my sexytimes on.