Fun fact: [long story about anal sex and geography]

Molly was trying to throw to commercial, Kellerman was trying his best to fart on air again.

Man, I wish Bomani and Pablo had actually discussed it more in depth.  But Bomani said a week or two ago on a different political topic “I like having a job so I can’t talk about this.”  The pressure is real.

As a person in attendance at this debacle, the crowd's favorite play was when Andy Reid decided his 21 total rushing yards was proof positive that a running play on 4th and 2 was the winning call. 

One of the things that’s super troubling about this is Maven basically saying, “the entrepreneurs get to post on Maven digital platforms” which is really fancy for “you’ll get exposure.” But, the whole myth of “exposure” is you do it long enough to catch the eye of a top level company in your industry LIKE Sports…

The swimsuit issue is now just ascii boobs, between pages of motor oil ads. 

Shocking that the owner of a sports team in 2019 with a racial slur for a nickname would do something shitty. To a white guy, I mean.

5am? My Lord that’s early. I can just picture Snyder there in his office, across from a barely awake Gruden, stirring his coffee with a sleeve of gatorade cups.

I am guessing that male critics criticized her because female directors weren’t funny and didn’t understand comedy, before comedy films even existed

We’ve removed that clause and issued a correction.

Khalil Mack was also an unannounced guest when he came in to sack Cousins on air because there was no one who bothered to stop him.

Choking and suffocating a person are completely different, like right Twix and left Twix.

I shall invent a device that alerts Dolphins fans when they are being erroneously charged for purchases. It will emit a Dolphin-call shriek if a skimmer is used to rack up a fraudulent charge. I will call it “the Miami Sound Machine.”

Damn it, I missed my opportunity to work in “Chimpan-A to chimpanzee” somewhere!

Burke doesn’t even work here anymore and he’s still giving Deadspin a solid 5 WAR.

He switches to Kirkland Original Bourbon-Style Corn Whiskey on the weekends.

18 beers a day, five days a week.