please please please tell me her Warhol clock is at 15:01 and it doesn't just start over

Great, Jezebel. Now someone out there is going to be dipping their balls in different sauces sometime later today just to make sure.

Vulcan was Pluto's nephew.

Nope. Perpetuity.

It's always the really really choice examples of white genetic supremacy that seem to believe in white genetic supremacy

Still only the second worst sports business decision ever.

If Emeritus really wants to do his partner a solid, he can pay him back by seeing Transformers 4 and letting his partner off that weekend.

Why didn't you say "hats designed for wearing"

Worth noting that in Birmingham in 1998, the first ever fatal bombing of an abortion clinic in the US occurred.

Maybe they realized that three mediocre guns weren't enough to pull people in to watch a minor league baseball game.

It must have been a shitty day of fishing. Something that small wouldn't even get my camera out of my pocket.

Can't wait for the first hilarious death to result from someone mixing their work and their drinking.

Ohhhh that poor assistant that had to tell J-Lo the little people were unhappy with her.

No, people who don't read the descriptions of things before watching them then bitching about the content (as if it's the website's responsibility to protect you from either the memories of your own experiences or your aversion to reading) are dumb, whiny and entitled.

Yeah they're literally the Greg Giraldo bit about stupid sitcoms come to life.

Well there's always the possibility of reading further than the title before you press play.

Am I the only one that despised both those two and almost everyone else on that show?

I know this is Lipsyte's cushy semi-retirement gig, and it was an excellent column, but how much output can we expect from the ESPN ombudsmen position? Poynter was practically nonexistent, Ohlmeyer was useless, and the fact that I can't even remember the other one says plenty too.

For anyone wanting more Kerry Washington goodness.

LAWRENCE V. TEXAS MOTHERFUCKER DO YOU SPEAK IT