Me too, except that Parenthood actress.

Maybe it's just all the Monty Python I've watched, but when I think of inbred morons I'm just as likely to think of these guys. (I guess technically it's still classist, too, but you know, the good kind.)

This is what Sarah Lawrence is like.

At least Bugs won't need to get the saw out if all the ice melted.

Ugh. I feel the same way when people bitch about Christmas and St. Valentine's Day. Get over yourself and eat some fucking candy.

When people tell me they're "just not that in to" Halloween, all I hear is static. Does not compute.

It's a such great holiday to filter new acquaintances.

So does this green light for bad taste mean that Jezebel will approve when I combine a sport coat, shades, cigarette, leotard and two balls of socks to create my "Joe Cameltoe" outfit?

Maybe I should let more than one person carry the message to Romeo that my death is faked.

I bet you don't even own a television. Tell me all about who you think is the most underrated beat poet.

I like this post a lot (love the points system), but I'm a bit confused as to how simply portraying something bad is offensive. First off, that's kind of the POINT of AHS. They messed with the Holocaust last year (I'm Jewish and was not offended- it was just campy and silly). If this show were actually condoning…

Sex, please! I don't drink coffee. I for one am so glad I don't need a substance to get me out of bed in the morning! Hmm I think I smell someone making coffee. Did I mention I don't drink coffee? It has so many chemicals in it. Are you guys going to Starbucks? Can I tag along and do they have hot chocolate? Because…

this is an Orca - which is NOT a shark.

I swear it wasn't anecdotal...
Ahem

You guys should know about NYC Basic Tips and Etiquette as well.

DO NOT DO THIS BETWEEN THE HOURS OF 4 and 6PM.

Thank you. Jesus, Thank you.

Also: If you swipe your metrocard three times and it doesn't work, Get Out of the Way and let the people behind you swipe some before trying again.

Amstel Light thinks he's sophisticated and worldly because he spent a summer backpacking in Europe.

Tito's vodka drinkers are the best looking, smartest, most thoughtful and engaging men on the planet. They exercise both upper and lower body equally and your friends and family will love them. They like big lazy dogs with droopy ears and soulful eyes.