YURI: [brandishes knife] I'm telling you Igor, Blake Bortles vaulted WAY over Teddy Bridgewater with his performance last night!

White feminist complaints about how she's an "entertainer" and not a real "artist" like [insert famous white female artist here], and she's not that pretty nor talented in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1...

?

If you're eating something and it winds up in your lungs, I'm fairly certain you're doing something wrong.

I soak mine in a Bloody Mary.

Soaked in juice? Do you have any idea what the glycemic index of juice is?!

I spent every Sunday last season watching football with my friend's boyfriend, which included brunch and sometimes a late lunch/early dinner. The vast majority of the time it was just the two of us. No one thought anything of it, because it's the furthest thing from "not an awesome idea" imaginable to share a meal…

Never leave an inebriated friend alone at a bar is for when you go out drinking with a friend and then you get an opportunity to hook up [that you would otherwise jump on], but you realize that means Jessica (who's three sheets to the wind) would have to find her way home on her own. So you do not hook up, or you get…

SAME THOUGHT.

To save half of you the trouble: OMG Fatties R Bad. Shame on you Laura for being a fatpologist! Health! CONCERN!!

Hey concern trolls, shut up. Seriously, just shut the hell up.

The amount of confidence I'm seeing in these women is astounding! I'm so proud of them, I want to be them! That makes them my role models, and they are beautiful!

You win a Burt Reynolds eclair! Eat up!

FIXED IT FOR YOU AMERICA

That gif is amazing.

Many many years ago I was at a bar in my hometown with some friends - a "fancy" bar for some 25 year olds with no money. We were excited that we had lucked out into getting a table. A friend went to the bathroom and as soon as she walked away and man walked over, put his hand on the seat and said "I can take this…

My best friend was on our university's concert committee as a freshman. Our very first concert that year was Ben Folds whose opening band was The Fray (this was before they had gotten majorly huge). One of the seniors asked my friend to take the opening band out to dinner, which I still think to this day is a stupid…