This is an outrage emergency! Get to an interior room away from all windows and idiots! Again, an outrage emergency!

Glad someone already took care of this.

No acrobatics in Skyrim is another example. I've been replaying Oblivion lately and I had forgotten how incredibly fun it is to progressively be able to jump higher and higher to ridiculous ends. I can't care about TESO because it's not at all what The Elder Scrolls is about. It's just another MMO and I burned myself…

I too am an oppressed white man living in America. I have fond memories from not very many moons ago, when my people were free and secure in our right to enslave anyone we damn well pleased. Our right to own slaves has been stripped away! All is lost!

I wanted to ask her why her child was old enough to order for himself, but not old enough to learn how to deal with disappointment, but instead of dealing with THAT can of worms, I opted to ignore her, because that's usually what I do when I have to stop and make sure I heard someone correctly. I can't formulate a…

When I worked at Subway, a woman came through with her kid, probably 10/11 and he asked for ketchup on his sandwich. Apparently this is a thing at some franchises, but not ours, so I said we didn't have any. She covered her son's ears and whispered "just pretend that you're putting it on".

Ummmmmmmm, no.

I know I should hope the guy who crashed is okay, but I don't.

Found one! Seriously. It's a damn good thing the person in the white truck wasn't standing by the door.

This is a pretty minor complaint by comparison, but I first took the title to mean that the messages were somehow being sent by her or her phone post-mortem and that was the creepy part. Using her name would have cleared that whole thing up as well.

This is so true. Sometimes I get into the habit of always giving 'okay' right after 'stay' so I try to periodically say something else in between so I know my dog is responding to 'okay' and not just the next thing I say after 'stay'. He usually almost goes when I throw in the different word, but he's pretty good…

The correct way to avoid security cameras. Walk above them.

Tell that to this lady.

I hope a bear eats that guy.

You just blew my mind.

There's a disappointing amount of arrogance and unpleasantness in the auto enthusiast crowd.

Why'd you have to bring Firefly into this. Harumph.

She would have a field day with that whole "Stumbled upon his phone" part.

Not quite. One human being gone doesn't help anything. It's all or nothing. By that reasoning the best thing I can personally do for the planet is get the entire human race to decompose ASAP, which is unfortunately still outside the realm of possibility. One day though...

Nope, I'd save the pig if I had to choose. Humanity is pretty much useless for anything other than fucking things up for everything else.

I don't suppose you have any particular reason for that other than "Go, humans, we're the best", eh? I have a problem with 100 soldiers or 100 pigs being killed. Not sure why humans are so much more important to you, but I suppose that's certainly within your rights.