Xanax. It's your friend.

Seriously? The Mate/De-Mate device? I thought that was a bottle of tequila.

Beat me to it. I was waiting for the donuts. lol

Although I've never had the opportunity to drive the Model S P85 D, this car presents as so damn good on spec that I am seriously considering one as my DD. Right now I have a Carrera 2 S that I daily and I had been considering a Hellcat Charger simply because the Porsche just doesn't have the "giggle factor" I'm…

Pffffft! No joke! I get called worse than "asshole" every day just in the normal course of business and I don't get anything free for it!

Bro's were so close to "rollin' coal" all those years ago....

Ahhh, who knew Dodge would be the innovator? Had THEY only known that they were simply 30-some years ahead of the curve with the "big chrome stacks" in the truck bed movement! They only needed the Cummins to go with them and who knows where they'd be today?!

Not sure, at that point, what the big hurry to get it out of the water was? I can almost guarantee, having those gentle SALTWATER waves lapping at the undercarriage and splashing up into the trunk, the engine compartment and, possibly the interior after the door was opened, that the Camaro won't be worth the crap…

<JDM Fan-Boy>Get outta my face with that American crap, yo. It needs a 2JZ swap, yo. Bro, it'd be making AT LEAST 1700hp on E85 then. Yo, my 240SX with a 2JZ is probably making like, 2000hp on PUMP GAS, yo! I mean, all I've got left is to save up for the 240SX and, you know, the 2JZ bro. Shit be expensive, yo. …

<typical-front_page-jalopnik-commentariat> What the actual f*cking hell, my grandma should be driving that car. Pfffffft. An automatic? Are you kidding me? Why not just drive a Camry or Sienna minivan? Call me when you've got a "real man's car" to show me and I'll care. …

I couldn't give two squirts of piss about the doucherocket in the Fit pulling that asshattery masquerading as "driving". The people I feel sorry for are the poor guy on the bike he almost kills initially then the followups in the oncoming cars that only fate and good fortune keep from becoming organ donors.

Wait, what? Grey? Seriously? How the hell did I end up in the greys? Heartbroken. Despondent. Depressed. All those things, I am in spades.

Yeah bro, I'm jelly. Seriously jelly.

For some reason, and it may just be me, the wheel/tire combo looks tiny from that side view. I'm puzzled, I know it's NOT a set of 14" wheels, but the proportion... *to me* ...just looks all wonky.

Did they turn DeMuro loose on that thing....?

What a bunch of micropenis little cocksuckers. Sorry mommy and daddy couldn't afford to buy you an Xbox One or PS4 for Christmas you whiney ass little bitches, but knock it off and go whack off again. You'll feel better.

Yeah, I'm gonna have to go with, "stay home and beat off" for a $1000 Alex. Nevermind safer, you know how fuckin' cold it is outside right now? I'm all toasty warm inside.

If it's such a shining, sparkly utopia he could've, you know, just... uhh... stayed there in the first place. Just a thought.

You know, you may very well be correct and, if so, I offer my apologies. My dad taught me early on (God bless his soul) that if you fuck up, be a big enough man to admit it. People respect that and respect is one thing you can't buy.

I don't recall reading where anyone was injured so I'm not sure "safer for everyone involved" actually came into play. Yes, recovery of the vehicle could be argued to be be half the purpose of the "chase", though I would argue that recovery of the property is less that 50% of the reason for the chase. That's what…