That’s Ha-mazing

It was probably Canadian beer, so no big loss

Yeah but his cross kinda sucked

Or Fox

The Tim McCarver show is must see TV, dammit.

If Timmy retires that’s a perfect fit.

And she was just about to do you. Bad timing.

Don’t misunderestimate Americans’ density.

Oh I suppose a good old-fashioned American truck isn’t good enough for you Madison libtards, huh?

I rode the maglev in Shanghai a few years ago. without getting too technical, I can confirm it was FUCKING AWESOME.

take your meds

Man my job sucks

Breathe into a paper bag. Put on your Chewbacca underoos. Climb into your batmobile bed (twin, natch). Grab your Superman binky. Pull your LOTR sheets over your head. Then gently rock yourself to sleep. It'll be ok.

+8

30 what?

Did you live outdoors 30 years ago? That sounds pretty rad for a toddler.

I actually don't know who she is

I pull this shit on my five year-old all the time. Well, except for the dunking part.

Ok, so Ordinary People didn't have any car chases. But you have to admit you didn't see that Mexican midget wrestling scene coming.

Silly boy. That’s a rhombus, not a ball.