Drake is Just Being Drake in New Leaked Song With Beyoncé

“All we ever talk about it me,” Drake mewls on “Can I,” a leaked song with Bey on the hook that hit the internet last night in full Drake confessional glory. Another track in which emo Drake lets it rip that he’s kind of an asshole but right now he’s ready to put that aside for you, baby. » 5/21/15 9:30am 5/21/15 9:30am

Russell Crowe Learns What Clickhole Is. Congratulations, Russell Crowe!

ClickHole is a site owned by The Onion that satirizes online media’s never-ending quest for creating viral content. Though it began as a site that specifically parodied BuzzFeed-style listicles and content, it’s grown to satirize internet publications in general. Most recently, it’s begun posting brilliant faux oral… » 4/30/15 3:40pm 4/30/15 3:40pm

Is WiFi a Government-Controlled Weapon That's Slowly Giving Us Cancer? 

You are, in all likelihood, reading this post on a wireless internet-connected device—a computer, a phone, a tablet. Think about the last time you used (or wanted to use) a wired internet connection; now think about how long you've been slowly poisoning yourself with WiFi's ovary-killing, tumor-inducing radiation. » 4/03/15 3:34pm 4/03/15 3:34pm

A 21st-Century Rip Van Winkle: What Changed In My Decade Behind Bars

When the New World was two centuries newer, Washington Irving set a fable, "Rip Van Winkle," in the oldest parts of New York State, where the original Dutch settlers' culture still lingered. Life was European then—just set in America. But progress stops for no man. The story's hero evades his nagging wife in the wilds… » 3/18/15 2:52pm 3/18/15 2:52pm

How To Tell If You're Being A Crank On The Internet, And How To Stop

Man, you sure are het up! Agitated. Can you believe these goddamn coddled athletes/P.C. Police/Now Finaglin' Cheatriots/Twitter-celebrated pop stars of possibly dubious talent/people talking about the colors on a dress when we haven't even solved all The Problems yet? I mean, cheese and rice! Where do they get… » 2/27/15 11:58am 2/27/15 11:58am